Concussion update: 2.5 months

Three months ago I was on top of the world. Yes, I was going through the typical teenager dilemma, struggling trying to balance my A+s and AP classes, volleyball, and (somewhat) maintain a social life. At that time it seemed hard, but I trudged along, I earned every 100 on almost every test and made time to have a little fun. Although I thought it was hard, and it was very stressful, I got small victories. I got a sense of pride when I earned the highest grade in the class or a tingle of happiness when a friend cracked a joke. It gave me light, something to follow, something to push me to continue drudging along. Fast forward a couple of days, at the thursday night game, I get hit in the head. Next thing I know I'm not myself. I am spending my time sleeping in a dark room or at the doctors office. Months go by and I don't heal. I am no longer trudging through life with hope on my side, I am being pulled back by my own brain. I can't stop myself, I can't fight it either, the only I can do is sit back and pray for the best.

Teachers, friends and doctors relate it to a broken ankle. An ankle takes time to heal sweetie, you can't run on it right away. I try not to  grimace every time I hear those words. Do they not understand that a broke ankle is NOT comparable to a concussion? Do they not understand that kids with broken bones can still go to school and have a good predicament of when they'll be healed? Do they not understand how agonizing it is to watch yourself fall behind, day by day, and not know when or if I'll every be able to catch up? I constantly have to remind myself that no, they just don't understand.

What seemed like a difficult like three months ago seems like paradise to me now. Kids tell me that I'm lucky to have a break from homework and school. Yeah, a great break if you like staring at walls contemplating life. One of the reasons I set my goals so high for myself is so I can throw myself into something that will benefit me in the future. Busy myself and get into a good college while I'm at it. Without any of anything, I'm left alone with my thoughts, and sadly, I am a twisted depressed person hiding under a perfect GPA and pink sparkles when I think. I try to give reason to things, wrap my mind around things that I can't control. The problem is that I just can't. Things that I did perfectly before I know do mediocre. I am average now, nothing for me to excel in and no tell if I'll ever be able to be back where I was before. And that scares me, scares the hell out of me in fact. The truth is, I've gotten to the point where I'm wondering if this pain will ever end.

Video: NEW Maybelline Rebel Bloom lipsticks

The moment I saw this collection, I knew I just had to go out and get my hands on them. After trying (and striking out) in many drugstores, I finally spotted a bright orchid colored display in a 24 hour CVS. It was perched on the bottom shelf, not touched, not even one lipstick missing. It was meant to be, I freaked inside, grabbed three and ran to the cash register. There are two other pinks that I want to purchase, but for now, the three shades I got are perfect. I got the lightest shade barely bloomed, the lightest pink petal pink, and the purple, lilac lavender. Ahhhh the purple, a beautiful orchid lavender with a slight pink tint. SUCH a hard color to track down anywhere, not only in the drugstore. And I'm just going to say I'm in love. This collection was made for me, full of light nudes and pastel pinks. Finally a collection that's not a brown kylie Jenner nude, a color that looks awful on me. I like the look of a light pinky nude lip, so light that it almost looks slightly white. You may think I'm crazy but I love the doll look it gives. Hope you enjoy!

Xxx Girl with the Pink Bow

Video: Holiday Gift Guide in YOUR budget

It is that time of the year again fellow people pleasers and gift shoppers. As we begin to take out our creamy stationary and let our pen scribble gifts for everyone on our lists until we realize that the pink ink isn't moving, we've come to a blank! Well not to fear... super bow is here (did I really just type that??!). But, on a serious note, I spent a lot of time brainstorming and putting this together so I hope this helps!

Xxx Girl with the Pink Bow

Video: Winter collective haul and what I got on Black Friday

I've been up to a lot of shopping lately, and a few I got on killer deals on Black Friday!! And.... surprise  I have an etsy shop as well!

I picked up so many amazing pieces, so check it out :)

Update on my life: I got a pretty severe concussion two months ago and am still recovering. So lots of sleep and very minimal electronics for me (I am down to 20 minutes of computer time a day). Hopefully I get better soon so I can get back into life because I feel like it's been put on hold for months. Worst feeling ever :(, BUT it has taught me some things and I think that God did this for a reason. I was drawing out and continuing something that I didn't love anymore, and this head injury really made it clear to me that I need to get into other things.

Xxx Girl with the Pink Bow